Depression, anxiety, trauma, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts haunt many men who bury their mental health problems in silence in the name of “manning up,” “staying strong,” or “dealing with it.” Several organisations are breaking the culture that makes men suffer in silence. LONJEZO EMMANUEL SIBWEZA writes.
On a cool Saturday morning in Blantyre, a group of men walked together and did something quietly radical: they talked about how they feel. But as the momentum builds, a harder question is emerging — is the movement reaching the men who need it most?
Morgan Khalifornia Solomon did not hesitate when asked why he showed up during the march.
“Being a man, you have to be strong. You are like steel. But a man is not a robot. A man can cry. A man can feel pain. When entangled in a cobweb of problems, I urge all men to reach out to trusted friends and discuss the issue,” he said on the sidelines of the march
Solomon was one of hundreds who participated in the Men's Mental Health Solidarity Walk on June 6, organised by Sorry I'm Not Sorry — a youth-led mental health advocacy organization.
The walk was part of Men's Mental Health Month, and culminated in the launch of a free 30-day therapy initiative for men championed by the organisation.
Beyond the event itself, the conversations on the ground that morning revealed both the urgency of the crisis and the complexity of solving it.
The Hidden Crisis
The statistics are stark. Asan Gunde, one of the walk's participants, stated it plainly: “Men are facing the worst end of the problems. Men die by suicide, and this is because we do not have support.”
On his part, Alick Overton from the Malawi Association of Counsellors bemoaned the disproportionate rate of suicide among men aged 20 to 40.
The statistics from Zomba Mental Hospital in form of new admissions reflect the growing crisis. The psychiatric facility admits more men than women and the trend is the same with re-admissions.
Zomba Mental Hospital Director Dr Raphael Piringu said of those being readmitted, 75% are men, at the facility that currently holds 375 patients.
"When people go home, they are stigmatised," he said. "Poverty drives them back. They cannot easily integrate in society. They do not feel accepted."
Sorry, I am not sorry
Thokozire Kadangwe, Sorry, I'm Not Sorry's Deputy Country Director, was clear about what the organisation's name is meant to communicate. "It means: I am not apologising for the issues I am facing. I am not sorry for being sick."
The organisation, she explained, was built on a belief that shame is among the most significant barriers to men seeking help and that dismantling it requires cultural intervention, not just clinical services.
KADANGWE -Men are speaking but we are not listening
Kadangwe was candid about what the organisation observes on the ground. “Men are not silent because they have nothing to say. Men are speaking. But we are not listening."
She said some men end up in multiple relationships not out of moral failure but in desperate search for someone who will understand what they are going through.
“The problem is that oftentimes we don't ask questions. We don't support men when there is job loss, bereavement, relational breakdown and there is no platform, and no culture that supports mental health."
Blantyre's Mayor Isaac Jomo speaking after the march said women's distress is more visible, more acknowledged, and more resourced, while men's suffering is frequently dismissed or rendered invisible — even in cases where the harm is severe.
"When implementing campaigns to address abuses against women, we should also reflect that some men are abused. The setback is the response to that abuse is different."
Solutions
Mthunzi Minds, one of the partner organisations is working with young people offering group therapies and training mental health ambassadors.
Towera Kawaye, the organisation's founding member described mental health as "a new phenomenon in Malawi" that is still widely conflated with madness. Her organisation's model is data-informed and community-embedded, built on the premise that young people must be vocal advocates for their own wellbeing.
KAWAYE - Mental health issues are sometimes mistaken for madness
One participant pointed out that besides conducting the awareness campaigns in the cities, it is important to extend it to the hard-to-reach rural areas, where the problem of mental health is problematic.
The consensus on mental health among organisers and practitioners is consistent. It is all about mainstreaming it.
“Every project must have a mental health component. There should be localised access. It must be a core health and human rights issue — not an afterthought," said Kadangwe.
The Sorry I'm Not Sorry model, in which community peer outreach (CPO) workers identify and mobilise men in their communities, then connect them to professional services — offers one promising framework for reaching beyond the already-converted.
As the march concluded and the crowd dispersed, Haffina Abdul Rahman, a participant who had come because she has lost family members to untreated suffering — offered the simplest and perhaps most powerful summary: "It is okay to cry. It is okay to open up. You (Men) are human. We care about you. We see you. Let's live in peace."
Lonjezo Emmanuel Sibweza, a passionate champion of Democracy, Good Governance and Human Rights, is Project Officer at the Centre for Solutions Journalism
